Motion Potion

So we've all learned through time and experience that not all motion sensors are created equal. Kind of like me and the leggy model on the cover of the magazine I just received in the mail.

Anyhow, on my latest venture cross country I had TWO episodes that about threw me overboard with the issue at hand - motion sensors. If you've been anywhere public lately, you will have noticed that the filthy, levered, paper towel dispensers are a thing of the past. We are now blessed with wonderful motion sensor dispensers that spit out hand towels and save us from germs and wet handles (ick!). I realize that we are a bit jaded regarding motion sensors due to the ineffective motion sensor toilets that we've all experienced. Nothing worse than preparing the loo only to have it flush on you right at the get go! Then, of course, once the time arrives and it should flush, it doesn't! Then, much to my dismay, it leaves us dancing around the stall like a bunch of monkeys trying to achieve the desired goal. FLUSH THE DANG TOILET ALREADY! After moments of pondering "what to do", our inner show girl mentality "kicks" in and we hoist our foot up to press the button on the wall (you know, the button that's there "just in case" the sensor doesn't work).

Now, I ask you... which is more gross. Shoe to the button (and or flush lever), or hand? That's just too much for me to get into right now. Either grosses me out. In general, I try to avoid public restrooms.

Back to the issue at hand. They are called MOTION SENSORS, not impact sensors. First I was in the Chicago airport and these two women are talking up a storm, washing their hands (thank you!) and then they sauntered over to the towel dispenser and one of them wHaCkS the sensor! It dispensed the towel, then she WhAcKeD it again! I'm telling you, this was a full contact sport for this woman. I thought to myself "wow, that's a way to get it done". But then I took a moment and thought "what if you had a motion sensor, and instead of giving the appropriate motion, I beat the living dickens out of you to get the response I wanted"? Needless to say, I let it go and tucked the episode in my pocket for later thought.

Not 48 hours later, I was in the Indianapolis airport and there was another woman SmAcKiNg the crap out of the paper towel dispenser! Hello! I don't hear anyone in there wrestling with the toilets! Come on people! Give it a try! Watch and learn... everyone else is figuring it out, join us!

Heavens, my airport stories are endless. I could go on for days and days. Maybe someday I will. Until then, please treat the paper towel dispensers that have motion sensors nicely and let them do their job! Maybe if we followed directions and quit being so dang impatient, we'd notice that it would work just fine without beating it to death!

Packing and Thinking (odd combo)

What is it about packing for a trip that sucks so bad? (Disclaimer: I do not like the word "sucks", but it is fitting for the topic at hand - apologies.) Unpacking is absolutely AWFUL as well. I'm sure my husband could tell you what a horrible "unpacker" I am. But really... why UNPACK everything and actually put the suitcase away when you're just going to PACK again in like a week (ok, sometimes two weeks). Don't get me wrong, the purpose of packing and unpacking is fine, but I think the packing and unpacking is just too darn close to doing LAUNDRY. YES! That's it! It's just like doing laundry! And WHO likes doing laundry? Gag. The neverending cycle.

Anyhow, I'm leaving for my zippy cross-country venture and I'm PROCRASTINATING (not unusual) the PACKING ritual. Writing about it isn't helping ease the *suckyness either, but at least it's helping in my procrastination. See, I can admit it. I am a procrastinator by nature, but I'm also OVERLY productive as well. I think that's how I balance it all.

Heavy sigh.... GET IT TOGETHER! It's time to ATTACK and get this done. I'm off to put in another load of laundry and iron the necessary items for my trip along with clean the house and make sure my hubby is set for the week without me (BIG sad face). For those of you paying attention - YEP... I said BOTH of those awful words in one sentence - laundry and iron. Whhoooooolalala! Shivers down the spine!

Off I go! Wish me luck. I'm going to need it. Bless us all, these are NOT my strong points.

*I know this isn't a word, but this IS my blog = my rules!

Happy Birthday!

Wow! You're turning the big 34! HaPpY HaPpY dAy to you my love! Waking up this morning about fifteen times (sorry about the early alarm clock and repetitive slapping of the snooze!) pondering you and your HAPPY DAY, I thought to myself how lucky I am to have you as my partner in life.

As you ground your coffee beans and poured your 3 HUGE cups of coffe, I giggled to myself because there are some things in life we "need".... you are what I need. However, I do agree that you need your coffee. Without your coffee, the mornings would be quite a struggle ;)

You, Joshua, are the one thing in life that makes me live like never before. Your spunky ways, your quirky needs for BIGGER, faster, louder! I may never understand, but that's what makes it so wonderful... so very YOU. It would be odd if I understood "why" you do the things you do, and if you understood the things I do. It's the mystery that keeps it all alive!

Tonight we'll feast with family and celebrate you and your entry into your 34th year of life! I'll have to be sure and thank your mom and dad. I know I'll worry about things that don't really matter, but nonetheless, I will worry... Is the house clean enough? Will we have enough food? Will the food be delicious? Is there enough room for everyone? Do I have enough yummy food options for the kids coming? Should we eat right away or wait? Oh... heavens, I don't know why I even worry about it all because in the end the only thing that matters is that everyone is together and we are so very lucky to have such wonderful family and a wonderful event to celebrate together.

I hope you'll like your present. I'm so very excited for you to unwrap all of the wonderfulness! I'm thrilled that this is the THIRD birthday of yours we will spend together and that for the second time I can give you a present! ha ha.. I'll never forget that our second date was your birthday dinner at Kalai's house. I was so nervous and excited at the same time! I remember the great debate on whether or not to bring you a gift.

Me: "Kim, do I bring a gift or not? I mean, I've known him for a whopping day and I don't want to be rude!"

Kim: "Oh, just get him a card or something. I'll call Kalai and see what she thinks."

Me: "YEAH, that would be great! Call her and call me back." (Yes, this reminiscent of being in 6th grade and having your friend call the other friend who could find out info for you.)

Kim: "OK, I talked to Kalai and she says to just come over and don't worry about it!"

Me: "Oh gosh... it's so stressful! Are you sure it's OK? I mean, I know she "SAID", but what do YOU think?"

Kim: "Just do whatever. He'll be excited you're there. WHO CARES!"

Me: "OK... I'll see you at practice and we can decide then...love ya!"

Needless to say, I showed up empty handed with my smile in hand, butterflies in my stomach and just HOPING that you wouldn't care I was coming straight from practice in my sweats. Yet again, I fell back on the "if he really likes me, he'll like me for who I REALLY am". Luckily, it didn't matter that I was empty handed AND in sweats. WHEW!!! You answered the door with a smile (and Coors Light in hand). The night was fun. I met your family and some friends, was interrogated by a darling 3 year old niece of yours named Kira, and loved every moment of it all. Who would have thought that little Kira at the age of 3 knew that her question "When are you guys gonna get married?" would have been so very relevant and honest. She obviously saw what we felt. WOW... What a special night and now, every year after, I'll always think back to what a monumental night it was. Second "date", your birthday, our first kiss, the night I met your family (well, minus Kalai.. I already knew Kalai).

That night was great, but I hope today is as wonderful, exciting and special as you are. I can't wait for 44, 54, 64 and beyond.... I love you. I cherish our moments and memories and I'm excited to add to our story tonight. MUAH! Happy Birthday MY LOVE.

Some Days...

Some days are those kick you in the butt kind of days. Yesterday and today were two of those days. Thank you Tuesday. Thank you Wednesday. Your lovely doses of "whooping" were much needed and appreciated (I can't believe I just admitted that). However, if you don't mind not visiting for a while, I would be very thankful and understanding.

Thursday, I look forward to meeting you.